the daily ish

Saudade

Have you ever found yourself at a loss for words when trying to describe how you felt? Where it seemed that despite the extensiveness of our English language, there wasn't a single word in our vocabulary that could do justice to whatever emotion was knocking at our heart's door? And for awhile, you were trapped in this sort of limbo trying to figure out how to explain it to others but since you couldn't, you didn't bother.

But then, by chance, you came across that perfect word that captured the feeling in its entirety?

Well, I have. And there's this immaculate joy that comes in that moment when you figure it out. It's kind of like finding that perfect song where each line's lyric just speaks to all that you're going through. And you're astonished, really...like damn, that is exactly what I'm feeling. There's this sort of relief to know that someone somwhere at some time felt what you're feeling here and now...to know that you're not so crazy and misunderstood as you once thought you were.

Anyway, my word is saudade. And it's not even English, it's Portugese. It's "a somewhat melancholic feeling of incompleteness...due to the absence of someone or something, to move away from a place or thing, or to the absence of a set of particular and desirable experiences and pleasures once lived". It's how I feel when I return from traveling. I tried to explain the feeling in this blog post years before I discovered the exact word for it. There's this sort of melancholy, nostalgia, yearning that comes over me...though those words alone are not enough. It's simply saudade. 

Which brings me to another point. How is it that there are just some words that can't be translated from one language to another? When if you try, you lose its essence. Why are there words that just can't be translated? Is there something in the history of the people who speak a certain language -- a history so unique -- that only they could create a word to capture a moment, a feeling?

Oh words, what clumsy but complex things you are.

Happy Birthday, MCL!

Holy whoa. Two blog posts in less than 24 hours. Rare but necessary as I just realized that today is the one year anniversary of My City Lives and I just have to send out my love. For those of you who don’t already know, MCL is an online platform that lets you capture and share your daily experiences around the city on video. Presented on an interactive map, these web stories show exactly where each video was filmed so you can learn more about the city based on the stories of others. It's unique and poetic and downright brilliant.

I had the pleasure of collaborating with MCL on behalf of blogUT to shoot some videos exploring the University of Toronto campus. I live and breathe that campus and this city and I just loved being able to document the everyday spaces that make for those simple but extraordinary moments that is la vie.

With MCL Co-Founder Adil & blogUT video partner, Coleman.

I often blog about my travels and love for other cities (see below) but the truth is, Toronto is in my blood. The vibrance of this city just makes me swell with pride and a quick scan through the many videos on the MCL website will show you just what I’m talking about. From our many coffee shops (a staple in my life) to the spaces of innovation, from the obscure spots to find your hipster girlfriend to our Corktown "ukelele jams", MCL captures what makes this city, well, live. It's more than a website, it's a place of discovery.

So with that, happy birthday, MCL! Thanks for bringing in the human dimension that makes our city the pure awesome that it is. Here’s to growing old and grey and taking on more cities than that interactive map of yours can even handle ;)

Sending my love to my friends at MCL (apologies for my sad Photoshop "skills")

Conceptualizing Community

I'm taking a course right now called "Foundations for Community Engagement" and though we're only two weeks into the semester, I've already fallen in love with the class. The basic theme that we've been uncovering is (you guessed it!) the ever popular conception of community . I (we) hear it all the time, whether it's on the civic level, national level, or global level. Heck, there's now even a burgeoning profession dedicated to building and growing online communities. Community is everywhere. It's a term that has become so naturalized within our daily discourse, seemingly universal in its application and understanding and yet, once thoroughly deconstructed, proves to be a conception that is highly contested in its meaning. There are community conceptions based on shared identity, interest, location, and/or experience. It's a terribly elusive idea and as I read through various theories and texts on the subject, I can't help but develop and reflect on my own interpretation of community.

My educational and professional experiences have fundamentally shaped my thinking of community as one that aligns most fittingly with that of Benedict Anderson's Imagined Communities. Whereas his work focuses on the nation state as an imagined community, my time working with and studying international NGOs has led me to look and think beyond national boundaries and see community as a global phenomenon. In my mind, the global village that Marshall McLuhan first conceived of really does exist, as the dual forces of globalization and technology has shrunk the world to such a point where every individual is at reach. Technology and its affordances, of course, play a crucial role in facilitating this imagined community. As someone who works at the intersection of international development and social media, I often interact and connect with individuals whom I have never met and may never meet. Yet, there is that common bond that runs through us all as globally aware and socially conscious citizens.

But alas, grasping community as imagined, as with all other understandings of the term, comes with both its advantages and disadvantages. This notion of a global village connotes a community of openness and inclusiveness, one that emphasizes humanity s similarities as opposed to geographic, ethnic, class, and religious fault lines that dominates other conceptions of community. Problems that were once viewed in the lens of national and/or geographical boundaries become problems that affect the entire world. In turn, everyone in this global village becomes a part of the solution and conceiving community in this way is powerful and empowering, resulting in a collective effervescence that transcends any sporting event, religious ceremony, or national celebration.

But maybe I'm being overly optimistic and maybe I'm wrong. Maybe this very global scope will turn individuals away, as the proposed imagined community may simply be too large for any one person to ever imagine. Maybe trying to connect with someone who lives across an ocean, under a different political system, with different skin and dress, and with different religious beliefs may just be too much. Thinking of community in a global sense may not elicit the same intense emotions or mobilize people in the same way that a community of, for instance, neighbours can, where people at least pass each other every day.

One of the primary texts we're currently reading in this class is Dave Meslin's Local Motion: The Art of Civic Engagement in Toronto. This municipal and local level thinking of community was a shocking shift in focus for me. I've been so caught up in thinking on an international level and addressing global issues, that I have forgotten the importance and saliency of local civic engagement. Reading chapters from Local Motion has been a refreshing look into the many communities within Toronto. It's been a powerful reminder of the importance of people taking part in seemingly small acts but with profound effects. Reading this has also brought to the forefront the debate over community in terms of proximity and purpose, moving me to rethink my vision of community. It may seem that looking at community at the local level is at odds with what I said earlier about my global vision of a community. But I don't think so. In my mind it's but one dimension of this multiplex conception. One of my favourite quotes from another book, Contesting Community, really captures my thoughts on the whole local vs. global thinking:

"Without a conscious wider vision, community organizations will remain focused on the local. The challenge is to build an agenda that transcends local work and to find ways to connect with broader organizations, and build alliances to work for fundamental social change."

It's here that the increasingly popular phrase "think globally, act locally" really rings true.

Anyway, that's my piece. What does community mean for you? Where is your community? And who is your community? It's intellectually stimulating and rewarding to take an idea or conception that's been so taken for granted and really take it apart and deconstruct its meaning(s). You'll find things you never knew were there, or had forgotten were there. Let's not forget to do this every now and again...

2010

Oh, the inevitable year in review post! It's New Year's Eve and I find myself (as usual) looking back on the year's blog posts, written letters, and photos, allowing myself that moment's respite. What can I really say about 2010? I think more than anything else, it's been a year of stability. A year of settling into myself. I've gotten into my groove at work and learned that I do really love and enjoy working at the intersection of the non-profit sector and online media. I've mastered this world of undergraduate studies (and am so very ready to move on!). And I've spent many a lovely moments with the people that I love...learning how to balance this trifecta that is my life. After the whirlwind that was my 2009, I think it's safe to say that this year was relatively tame...and thankfully so!

But it's drawing to a close and something tells me that what lies ahead will be anything but tame or stable. 2011 is graduation year and no longer will I be enclosed in the safe shell that I've known all my life, this world of school and academia. I end my 16 year romance with formal education...thrilled and apprehensive at the same time. And what comes next? Who knows? I've no plans and no maps laid out in front of me. I didn't do the whole grad school application thing nor am I planning to do the whole find-a-job-and-jump-into-the-rat-race thing either. Instead, I hope only to satisfy this beast of wanderlust that lies inside of me, travelling to new countries and exploring different cultures. I'll be in this in-between place, a sort of limbo as I figure out what my next move should be. 2011 and beyond is just a whole load of uncertainty. No firm plans of any sort. Terrifying? A tad. Exciting? Beyond.

Alas, it looks like 2010 has been the calm before the storm. And as for 2011? Je ne sais pas! So in the meantime, let's drink to the year that was and welcome the unknown that lies ahead of all of us!

Cheers to you all! Here's to making ourselves and the world better each day...

 xoxo.